Feb 16. Today was an early bird day & I guess the opportunity to get the worm didn't present itself to me, or maybe it did. I started off by leaving the house at 6:30AM to catch an early meeting. I ended up having breakfast & coffee mid morning & made a few phone calls to people I needed to catch up with. I was just in my normal "existing sober" routine for the most part all day, nothing really significant. Hours past and dinner came & went, before I knew it I was heading to the evening 12 step meeting I go to. The tuesday night meeting is specifically an early recovery meeting and covers the first three steps as an introduction to the actual action work. I chose to go to this meeting for a variety of reasons which is basically my topic for tonight.
Other than doing a good job at maintaining my Sobriety the past month or so I haven't really made much ground as far as "spiritual or sober progress" is concerned. In terms of 12 step work I have been at a standstill because I've been putting some of my attention back into what some people consider 'normal life' stuff. That was time that in the past few months I devoted to the actual action & education work in the program. I try to take my own inventory honestly and without being afraid of the truth in something about me, but its difficult to do sometimes. Its also difficult to take action when you do find something that you can actually "do" to make things better. So here I am at the early recovery meeting, listening to others share about vital things that I am currently maintaining instead of adding to in my Sobriety.
Hearing so much of what I needed to hear I chose to share, talking about some of my shortcoming in the past and as of late. After the meeting I even called my sponsor, explaining to him how I've felt "busy bodied" by normal life circumstances that I have created for myself. Its ever more evident that in order to prevent slipping back into the grip of the disease of alcoholism/addiction, I need to be growing spiritually. I can't just maintain my current level of progress and expect the rest of my life to be sunshine and sugar. The reality hits my stomache like anyone who is running a tight life schedule, it is heavy and makes me not want to move and take action. I MUST. There are countless friends with decades of Sobriety that are only a phone call away for me and willing to work in the book & on me with the long list of step work yet ahead of me.
Tonight I want to share my gratitude for the recovery programs and the open meeting tonight that helped me remember what I am to do. The path to good and stable sobriety is right before me and I don't have to walk it alone. I am reminded of that every day when I meet with other alcoholics/addicts to share at these meetings. Tonight was a reminder that there is work to be done. When I got sober I said "Whatever it takes, I'll do it." That remains true today, even if what it takes is showing up to hear what the next right thing is. I hope all who are in search of growth in their life seek out those who are in a position you want to be, put our pride aside. If we open our minds and are willing to take action the teacher will appear when the student is ready. I guess my job now is to let people know that I am ready to get back to work. Thanks for blogging in, for now.. Good Night. Good Morning.. <3 Jimmy
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