Compelled - When The Spirit Takes Over

June 02. Wednesday is almost gone & I am over the hump in the middle of the week. I accomplished alot today in both social & spiritual fields, I feel much has grown in this 24 hours sober. One day at a time & its working. I woke up early to meet my mom & fill up the gas tank, my 4yr old nephew pumped it for me. Afterwards I drove out to meet my best friend Tommy & my cousin. After a few hours my cousin came home & we watched a movie with my mom that spiritually touched the three of us. The Book Of Eli was the title & I don't want to spoil it, so if your looking for a spiritual movie check it out. After that I caught a quick powernap, then woke up a few minutes behiind schedule & rushing to get changed. I had a commitment at CMC Hospital to run an AA meeting for alcoholic & addicted patients in the hospital. I will talk more about that meeting later, to finish my cousin came along & we went out for a little while after. I ended my night dropping him off & watching some tv before coming home. It was a great day spent with people who are important to me, moreso than ever & an even better evening spent with strangers who I am spiritually connectd to like brothers & sisters.

When I say that I am connected to them, I reffer to the fellows at the hospital that came to the voluntary meeting. No one who showed up was forced or imposed upon to show up & there were 6 in total, 8 counting my cousin & I. I took this commitment initially as to just tag along & help my sponsor put the meeting on. It wasn't until he told me yesterday he had a conflicting event that I knew I would be the chairmam, running the meeting, instead. I was happy to take the commitment on full sail, but in the same not nervous as these were alcoholics & addicts I had never met before, say for the one kind soul who accompanied me.. my cousin. When they announced the meeting to the patients & the small room filled up with faces I suddenly became comfortable. I cannot explain where the comfort came from, I want to say it was from my higher power soothing me with the sight of other alcoholics flocking to the message.

With my nerves calmed, I had forgotten any and all things I had set out to mention. I opened the meeting according to the format that the fellowship has laid out, asking volunteers to help read the 12 Steps, Traditions, Preamble & Promises. This was all familiar to me, I have chaired 4 meetings prior to this thankfully. I did not know how I would "qualify" myself, as in what parts of my story I would tell to reveal my qualifications to chair an alcoholic recovery meeting. I didn't need any prior knowledge of how I would do it though, when the time came I simply was taken over by the spirit & began telling my story. I didn't have to decide what parts to include or leave out, it just flowed from my heart & off of my tongue. I truly believe that my higher power had used me as a tool to carry the message of hope to these still sick & suffering addicts & alcoholics, why?, because they connected to the story I told. When I concluded my story & opened the meeting to them, as it was their meeting afterall, there was no hesitation for the first to speak & share their need & desire for help.

The meeting went back & forth between the 6 patients, my cousin & myself. I somehow managed to connect with these alcoholics like my sponsor & members of my support group did with me. The miracle of the 12 Steps, or at least the seeds of its fruits, had been planted for later use if not sooner. I am inspired by the strength of the patients we met with today, no different than you or I, they have faced as many challenges if not more & have a desire to live sober today. They only need solutions to their disease as do I, the message in the end is the same. It was a great pleasure to have been of service to not only them, but the fellowship, and most importantly my Higher Power. I believe that a great part of my purpose & time left on this earth in my body is to be spent doing just as I have tried tonight, to help others in any way I can. I must always remember to put my sobriety first or I be of no use to anyone drunk or high. I will pray for these newcomers & the still sick who need another chance, may they find the same chance I did in the same 12 Steps & the people that carry that message. And may you, my friends, find the light of the spirit brightening your path today, tomorrow, & forever. Good Night.. Good Morning.. <3 Jimmy