Keeping It Green

June 01. Hey my friends. So here we are entering June, it was this time last year that I had finally reached the bottom of my alcoholic barrel. What a spiritual & enlightening climb back out it has been for the past 11 months. I had a great day today, although the morning & afternoon was uneventful & I slept too long. I had dinner with mom & dad then got ready to leave while they fixed one of my display cases for my jewelry shop. Out the door & a few towns over I was 5 minutes late for the meeting. I didn't miss a beat thankfully & when it started someone shared first & foremost, their message was sad & a grim reminder for me. She had not only relapsed, she was also intoxicated at the meeting. In tears & fumbling for the right words she proclaimed the need for help, she had lost her way & got off track from the principles of sober & spiritual living. It was this message that keeps it "Green" or fresh in my mind & the many people afterwards who shared their love & tolerance along with their willingness to help her regain a sober life that makes the miracle of the 12 Steps & spiritual living so apparent to me.

"Keeping It Green" is something that any person trying to refrain from repeating their past must do. Its exposure to other's mistakes, newcomers who are still sick & suffering, and relapses that help do this. Some would say that not seeing this & going on with life without any exposure to alcohol or drugs would be the way, I disagree. Certainly we must avoid people, places & things that we used to fuel our disease with, we should not go hopping bars to see the effects of alcoholism first hand, but in an environment of recovery when someone comes in influenced by their disease instead of healing we get a face to face reminder of what our own lives used to be like, or could be one day if we go back to our old ways. See some of us have not hit bottoms as low as others, many people in fact have not been as desperate or hollow as I was when I came to the rooms, but the good part of it is that it's not necessary to go that low if we are thoroughly convinced we cannot go back to that life.. keeping it green through seeing others in positions we were or were heading is a great way to do that.

Aside from "Keeping It Green" we must obviously begin to change to stay away from our natural alcoholic insticts taking over in our life, we do that through the 12 Steps, Sponsorship, and taking suggestions instead of doing things our own way. Afterall our way, well I will speak for myself, MY WAY got me 14 years of addiction and almost dead enough times that I ended up screaming HELP. I am sure when I first arrived into the fellowship that I must have been a fine specimin of "Green" reminders for the veterans of recovery. I can look back in my journals & even on this blog as proof of the psychic change that has occured in me. Each day I turn it over & learn how to live this spiritual & sober life I become more well rounded & less rough around the edges so to speak. If I were to go back out that would be a true display of my self will, reminding everyone else where taking your will back will get you, keeping it fresh & green for those who were on the spiritual path.

If alcohol & drugs did not spiritually bankrupt a person a relaspe would be nothing more than a risk of one's physical health or death. But it truly affects us deep within. Those who are not alcoholic are affected for the few moments they enjoy the relaxing & intoxicating effects of the drink, but those who are addicted or alcoholic are sent into an uncontrolable spiral downward in spiritual means. That is the defining difference, that is why one drink or drug can destroy everything a sober person has worked for. In the few seconds it takes to get drunk or high we can lose what has taken us ages to build. That is something I am not willing to allow to happen in my life, that is so long as I "Keep It Green" & remain teachable, willing to help others in need, and always remember that the solution is through the constant application of spiriual principles in my life. If I don't pick up the first one I won't have to live in worry of which is my last. Good Night.. Good Morning.. <3 Jimmy