Spiritual Freedom - 4th Step & Letting Go

May 31. Hello friends & a very happy Memorial Day. I hope you all spent your holiday spending quality time with those who matter & remembered the sacrifice that has happened by soldiers in order for us to be free to do so. I couldn't have asked for a better day, even though some things were missing. Everything seemed to go right & that is an ongoing pattern in my life the longer I am sober & willing to work a spiritual program. I spent half my day with my family & the second half with my best friend & his family. Only a few small things that I won't mention could have made it a better day, neither one of those things are a drink or drug thanks to the Grace of my Higher Power. After both parties I went to my usual Monday meeting at MARS Group & we had a very emotional & relieving meeting there. A reality & urgency to face certain things in my past that still hold back the person I am today became apparent.

It has come to my understanding that as I honestly & fearlessly search myself, there will be things that cause fear, pain, resentment & in the end can cause me to pick up a drink again if left inside to decay my spirit. The key is to being freed from these haunting things of the past is to get them out, in my case on paper in my 4th Step. By being complete & honest about this pain, fear & resentment I can ahcieve freedom from it later, by letting it go to my higher power & forgiving others & as well myself. But we cannot just simply forgive on the surface, we have to search ourselves for everything that is inside & find the bad & hurtful. Writing it down in the 4th Step is a way to do this & actually bring a reality to situations that we can physically touch & see. It makes it later possible during our 5th step when we admit it all to our higher power & to another person, we can then work toward letting it go, realizing our part, and forgiving those necessary.

That doesn't mean we let harmful persons back in our lives or that we go back to our own old ways after the forgiveness, both of these could get us hurt again or bring on an all new resentment. Instead we continue to work on ourselves & grow from the experiences we collect in sobriety & spiritual living. The changes in us come in hard work & over time, some things that we come to peace with even involve people we may never see again or who cannot or will not change to be a purposeful member of our lives again. But we do not do it for them, we do it for ourselves to be unchained from ourselves & live free in spirit. I thank my higher power today for the 12 Steps & for truly having handed us all a great program, that I may one day be rid of the things inside which have rules me in fear & pain for over a decade. There is a great task ahead of me & through the help of others I will walk the path of freedom. Just as through the help of others we live in Freedom as a country. Let Freedom Ring on Memorial Day & every other day of your life. Good Night.. Good Morning.. <3 Jimmy