Forgiveness - It's Forged My Freedom

July 21. Hey friends, supporters, readers & fellow bloggers. Well it is past midnight, I am officially beginning my march towards another day sober. One year has come & gone in sobriety & the difference in my existance & direction is staggering both spiritually & in countless other areas of my life. I have so many to thank, my higher power, the 12 Steps, all of my genuine friends & my family, a great sponsor & a support group of people who have stepped up to the plate & shown me what works to live a healthy & spiritual life. I am far from the goal, but I am farther from the start & the farther I go the closer I become. I feel I have finally arrived in my place in life, walking to a beat that is mine & my own, it is constant & steady through times of hardship & pain which are the pathway to peace. I have you all & many more to thank eternally for the gift of support in my sobering journey. My parents have been some of my strongest supporters, they have grown with me & we have begun to recover as a family through love, understanding & the steps working in my life. The most important part of the Steps in my life thusfar is the embracing of a real & personal higher power in my life, whom I often don't speak it's name in this blog but for thanks I will this one time. Thank You God! :) Please do not take offense or believe that I say that to lead you to believe in the higher power of my understanding, it is my own & what works for me, you WILL find your own if you wish to.

With so much to be grateful for, I did little of showing it today, I took a page out of my creator's book & decided to rest for a day after all I have done. It felt good to relax on a day of significance in my life, I spend the evening doing what has helped get & keep me on the sober & spiritual path, I went to a meeting. I got asked to chair the early recovery meeting again & what a better way to celebrate the gift I have recieved than to give it back in service work to others, so I gladly accepted. The meeting was centered around forgiveness, of self mostly but also of others. My message to the group was what I have come to understand & what has helped me to go on despite the monstrosity that was my life before getting sober. I had shared that my higher power was a forgiving one, that I know it understands that I was sick in active addiction & did awful things out of a warped & diseased necessity. It is the lack of doing those things today that shows I am indeed deserving of its forgiveness, I have adopted change into my life & am genuinely sorry for the wrongs I have yet to even right in some cases. My higher power has forgiven me long before I asked it to, when I changed my ways I was forgiven, when I asked it was a formality, and when I forgave myself it was a sealed deal. I believe that in all my heart & soul, my spirit is free because of it. Despite my needs as I go through the Steps to make ammends to those I have harmed, I am still forgiven by my higher power & myself. That means even if those who I offer ammends to later do not forgive me, I am still forgiven by who matters most, that is my higher power & myself. Afterall I must live with myself & my higher power today, and I also believe when I die, those who cannot forgive may not make it to where I will be one day, in life spiritually & after life as promised in my beliefs.

This isn't a matter of beliefs though, its a matter of what is right. It is right to forgive those who have changed, who have offered ammends, and who admit their wrongs. It is spiritual to then also admit any part we have had when they do offer us those ammends, if we had no part & were a pure victim start to finish, it is humble to just forgive & move on. It won't always go this way, not all are well spiritually & not all walk with the spirit in forgiveness. I can only be an example of this as I march toward another year sober. I can start by remembering to forgive myself for my mistakes so long as I have changed my ways, I can be an example to others even when they will not do things right. I can be convinced as I am, that spirituality is the defining difference between life & an awesome life. I can continue to share my message, that is the message of the miracle of sobriety, a higher power, spirituality, and what good people can do together if they so chose to. Thank you all again for a great year in my life, it has been the best year in my existance, may they only get better from here. May yours only get better from here & may I be a part of the greatness in your life if I may, to share in the joy of others is a joy in itself. Good night.. Good Morning.. Good Year!! <3 Jimmy