If At First.. Try Again - Determination

Jan 17. Hey friends I wanted to get on here much sooner but its been one long weekend that took more out of me then I expected. So much has happened in two days that I don't know where to begin. I think the best thing to do is talk about whats on my mind from the whole two days.

Last weekend the market went very well. I made some decent money on saturday & enough to cover costs and profit a few bucks on sunday. I knew that new ideas and things to sell were necessary for the next weekend so I dedicated some time during this past week to make that happen. With outside issues taking shots at me I managed to get the job done & acquire the beaufiul array of jewelry that I put out this weekend to make money with. The investment compared to the potential income from it looks promising, but the one thing that could go wrong this weekend did. Even though the presentation & layout of the jewelry looks professional & its all new pieces at a fraction of the prices in stores, people just weren't buying. I used my people pleasing skills, offering to let customers try pieces on, but still no sales. Saturday had come & gone with no financial achievement. I sold a few odds & ends items to cover the cost of gas to get up there & have lunch.

If saturday wasn't my 6 month sobriety date I think the entire day would have been a let down. I focused on that detail and held on tight so that I wouldn't get down over a bad day at the market. At the meeting that night I spoke about living one day at a time, how adopting that principle has allowed me to make it six months without a drink or a drug. If I had to picture making it that far in the beginning, instead of just getting through one day, I may never have made it to six months. When urges & obsessions to use came up or something like a bad day of sales, it was a common practice of mine to try and remember that I need only get through today because tomorrow will be better. That was the attitude I went to bed with saturday, might I add after going out for coffee and food with friends, it was a very late bed time knowing I had to be up at dawn for the market again.

Sunday morning came & I fought the fog out of my eyes with a cup of coffee & a prayer. I made it through yesterday's failure at the market & had to go "Try Again" if I wanted it to work at all. If I didn't keep trying, it won't work out. Much like my sobriety, I am taking this very seriously. I know that not everything will work the first time & it needs a second or third attempt to see results, alot like the 12 step program I work. So off to the market to open up shop. The morning crowd passed through looking & touching many beautiful pieces of jewelry. No sales though. As the afternoon approached I could at best hope for a single sale to cover my costs for the day. My prices were even to the competetors in the market & my chains were of better design & quality. I couldn't figure out what I was missing. The stormy weather crept in and the last rush moved through, I sold two simple pairs of earrings that covered my cost of lunch & gas to get there. That was a day, the closing announcement went over the speakers & it was time to pack up.

My cousin had done quite well off of two sales in memorabilia. I had thoughts like, 'I'm selling the wrong products?', 'People just aren't interested in this stuff?', and 'Is the economy that bad that people can't afford luxuries at half the price of a department store?'. Then I put the blame all on myself for a while. I guess not having the six months to celebrate anymore was what allowed the negativity to creep in a little more. It took some real soul searching, a call to my father, and really putting myself in the shoe's of the consumer to decide my next thoughts as I left the market for the week. None of the lack of business was my fault. I DO have the right prices, a BEAUTIFUL presentation, and THINGS people want. What I needed to do was remember that this was one day, one weekend. Things can happen differently next time. I survived the day, now next time I need only try again. If I gave up in early sobriety because a craving didn't go away or came back the next day, I would be high right now instead of sober & in business. If I just give it my all again next time, leave the results up to my higher power, and don't use a drug or a drink things will show themselves for what they are. Its too early to give up on my opportunity & one bad run at things should not define the rest of my stay at something. I've never let a bad meeting or a bad conversation take me away from my spiritual growth or a program, I can't let this take me away from this opportunity. So I am ready to take on the week, gather my resources, and "TRY AGAIN" next time. God willing I will be as successful one day as I am in my sobriety to date. "Have we ever been determined to succeed? How did it feel when we didn't hit the mark we expected or needed to? Did we try again when failure seemed to be our only result? Are there things in your life that your willing to continue to lose at, so that you can one day win at them?" Just a few questions I asked myself & maybe we all can ask ourselves. Its never worth giving up 5 minutes before the miracle happens. If we only stay strong, stay dedicated, and try again we can achieve all great things within the ability of human bounds. My higher power, God, wants all of us to do our best, have faith in ourselves, & TRY AGAIN if we do not at first succeed. I ask daily for the strength to try all things that will help me help others. Thank you for blogging in. Until next time.. Good Night. Good Morning.. <3 Jimmy